"crack, crack, crack"

today dr chong took a look at me.. he's a bone specialist.. n after the powder "x-ray".. he concluded tat my backbone is bad.. foot bones dislocated.. which explain why i always fall down = unbalanced.. left shoulder lower than right bcos i carry my bag on the left side.. left hand is bad.. n so.. i always have migraine on the left side of the head.. looked at my nails n tongue n face.. he concluded ... i am super weak.. n i haf sleeping disorder.. bcos some bones were dislocated.. n yes everything is true.. so he crack crack crack.. my whole body.. i felt better after everything.. got to let him check me again in 4 days time..

for the last time..

.... i will believe

8 july 2007

one month should be sufficient to heal the wound that is 6 years deep

haiyo..

today is a happening day.. (but i think my everyday is v happening)..

1. tution: stress bcos ms c will b away for sometime n ME cannt teach han yu ping ying..

secondly, ethan calls me a scary cat.. bcos i am afraid of the sound made from the markers when writing on the white board.. then i hate it when i haf to erase the board.. n today.. i looked away n cover my ears.. ethan was sooo sweet.. he helped me to cover my ears while i erase the board.. if he is my age or older, i would haf fallen in love with him...

2. told wg bye bye = resigining.. BUT...

wg: before u go, make sure u give me all the japan maps, places to visit, cheap shopping areas...
me: i m jus a ph call or email away leh..
wg: (kept quiet)
me: unless u don welcome me back lar
wg: NO

n so the show started.. i sat down n rest since i am limping.. zzz n he came n chat with me..

wg: i will not deactivate your account, you just come when you r free
me: hmm.. but the minium 3?
wg: u jus come once or twice a mth, i'm fine with it..
me: orh..

y he refused to let me go?? hai.. today i was chatting with wg all the time lar.. we jus sat down n chat.. zzzz then everyone else siam... k lar nvm.. we chat for more than 3o mins lor.... haha... of course i told him i'm shortlisted for sm @ esplanade.. then he said wat's that.. i told him roughly the job scope.. he din look unhappy..but jus puzzled.. so i told him i will sneak in n update him haha.. since he refused to let me go... i shall appear @ dc when i haf nth to do lor..

3. w wants me to perform for aug's concert with sws @ esplanade.. but i told him i will b back the day before!!! n i will miss 4 rehearsals.. he said he's ok with it, jus perform.. zzzzz

w called me su-ba-ri-na on WED during rehearsal!!!!!!!! n he rejected a call for me when my ph was ringing (silence mode) during the rehearsal.. zzz he v funny ar.. it was quite happening on wed.. k came to rehearse with us...movement 2 n 3.. quite fun to play this piece.. but when i went home.. n removed my bandaged.. HALF OF FOOT WAS BLUE-BLACK!!!

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!

more than one yr ago i volunteered in a women theatre festival as a production crew.. our in-charged happened to b the production manager in esplanade.. she asked me to hand in a resume for the stage manager position.. ok so i did...

today.. 3 mins ago.. they called... uhm uhm.. interview on 3 July, Tue, 3.45pm...

i guess quitting the job at dc is GD.. more gd offers coming up.. wahahhaa...

dvds for RENT!!

it was supposed to b a trip to buy SHREK from mac in jb since c wanted to collect all the members n we couldnt find it in sg.. but it turned out tt SHREK was sold out n we ended at buying lots n lots of dvds.. reached jb @ 9pm+.. dunkin donuts were sold out when i reached there.. =(

after 2 hrs in the video shop.. (everyone was waiting for the 2 of us to pay money before they r allowed to go home!!) we ended up with 200 dvds!!! the total bill was more than 1000RM... the fun part was hiding them in the car.. luckily her car is super big... n we looked very innocent..

of which 85 belongs to me..i bot the followings:

• LOST Season 1, 2, 3
• Heroes Season 1
• PrisonBreak Season 1 and 2
• Ocean's Eleven, Ocean's Twelve
• Pirates' One and Two
• Antz
• Princess Hours 2
• Happy Birthday (Chinese)
• One korean drama
• One taiwan drama
• I'm a cyborg but that's ok (Korean movie)
• Tank's latest album
• Prince (Nicholas' latest album)

Grace's

• Sex in the city Season 1-6
• Ugly Betty Season 1

OK.. dvds for rent.. 1 disc for $1.. leave a msg shld u b interested..

ahhh!!

mum scolded me in the morning (as usual).. "nv walk properly again.. always fall down.. old already then u noe."

went to the TCM downstairs.. forced dad to drive me there.. haha only 1 min away.. Dr Tan poked SIX needles on my foot... pain.. pain.. n PAIN.. n rub for me.. zzz i screamed most of the time of course.... haha.. i bet c is gonna laugh @ me when i go over to her place later.. zzz

swollen foot..

i fell down on sat evening @ esplanade concert hall from the staircase down circle 1 during intermission!!!!

firstly i am not good with stairs.. i always fall down one.. haha.. even on level ground.. so i haf a phobia for climbing down or up stairs..

secondly, it has been proven by 1 TCM n 1 lady that due to the size of my feet n my ankle being too small.. i cannt balance well.. zzzz

thirdy, i was replying a msg while walking down the stairs.. zzz bcos of y lar.. i fell down.. he msged me.. hai..

luckily i fell down n sat on the stairs gracefully.. but bcos there were too many pple in front of me. ALL of them stared at me when i sat down on the stairs.. ONLY ONE guy walked towards me to offer his help.. zzzz.. but i think he is not shuai enuf.. so i told him "it's ok".. n so he left.. the rest jus stared at me.. so embrassing.. i had to stand up after i realised everyone was looking at me.. but i stoned for a while bcos i cant walk.. it's v painful.. still.. i tried to walk to the side but i couldnt walk.. so i stood beside the stairs. n everyone continued to LOOK at ME! one casusian couple walked towards me n asked if i'm ok.. i couldnt talk.. so i showed them the "ok" sign.. another chinese couple looked at me.. i showed them the "ok" sign again.. although my foot was VERY PAINFUL.. i act as if i'm ok.. i smiled at everyone n stand straight while waiting for mr i to return from the washroom.... couldnt walk up the stairs.. had to hold on to mr i's hand for support.. but i endured the pain n act as if nth happened n walked up the stairs.. zzz.. tml mus go to TCM if nt i cant walk for a few days but i think EVERYSPRING @ thomson, opp united sq, is not open on sun... zzz hai.. gonna try the one downstairs... poor feet oways suffer..

fyi.. i alwasy fall down one.. the highest record was twice a week.... zzzz until my TCM had to check my foot n concluded that i cant balance properly due to my small ankle or feet.. watever..
I hate stairs!!! so pls forgive me if i walk very slowly when climbing up or down any stairs.. bcos i am trying not to fall down..

ps: future bf or husband mus hold my hand when i take the stairs.. thks ar..

gingy!!

i bought gingy today from mac's happy meal!! sooo cute!. i wan pinocchio.. who wanna eat happy meal n pass me the pinocchio?

c is like a big sister

after tution, went for a hair cut today at esther's new shop wif c n c washed my hair for me.. oops!.. din trim my hair for 3 months!!! bcos esther was looking for a new unit n finally found one... nobody can touch my hair except esther!! she's gd.. she's my stylist.. orchard rd standard + products (i use c's own purchased hair products) but hdb price! her new shop is near IKEA, Blk 1. "Ge Ling Salon".. i chatted with c for 3 hrs n she told me a lot of stuff..

c told me to stop beating around the bush.. talk things out.. i agree.. it's nt that i don't wish to wait anymore.. i think i shldnt wait aimlessly? tell me for the last time if we r both waiting for the same thing.. if yes, i can wait.. the past 2 yrs haf been difficult, i almost "killed" myself if nt for the pple around me who "entertained" me when i am super down..esp for dear s who is a just a call away.. i jus ned a hope, jus tell me tt things will / will NOT b positive 2-3 yrs later.. for now, jus enjoy ur life there n mine here..

c scolds me tt y do i put all my hope on U!!! she said she has A LOT OF cousins around my age who r SINGLE n super eligible.. haven introduce to me yet.. haha.. but i told her bcos for the past 6 yrs.. things that happened between us made me believe in destiny.. she agrees in the end..

c told me tt k wants to pick up her piano playing n would like to purchase a 2nd hand piano.. i told c to tell k to jus get a keyboard.. firstly, her fingers r hard by now n if it's jus for destressing, a keyboard is gd enuf.. secondly, the boys can try out if they r interested in music.. thirdy, a piano is no cheap, though they r SUPER rich, buy a piano / organ only when the boys really enjoy the music lessons... n oso k wants me to teach her 2 sons keyboard.. i said no problem! n so now, i haf 5 private students waiting for me to teach them music..

c told me tt v n herself dote me a lot, though v always says tt i shldnt do this n tt, she loves me a lot..they see sth tt suits me, both will look @ each other!! esp when they saw the chanel 2.55!!! will they get one for me when i start work? uhm uhm? i don mind!! it really feels gd to haf 2 big sisters who take gd care of me, i learned a lot from them..

i guess for the past 21 yrs.. i have been a lucky girl.. times when i fell down, i stood up again n the road ahead was always brighter.. i used to tell s tt i am soo afraid tt this luck will disappear one day n i will b super unlucky.. but now, i simply just enjoy my everyday happily..

c sent me to ulu pandan today for rehearsal after our chi-chat session.. only g n i were around in our section.. super sad.. i was slacking most of the time.. the pieces were v easy.. if everything goes well.. i shld b performing for this concert wif sws on 12 aug 2007, sun @ esplanade concert hall - beautiful sunday.. ONE day AFTER i reached sg from my 1 mth holiday in USA.. mum told me not to perform bcos she's afraid tt there may b some flight delay or watever n i may nt b back on 12 aug.. uncle told me tt we will reach sg on 11 aug afternoon.. *finger crossed!

i gif myself 3 mre yrs with teaching, teaching n more teaching before i spend time with myself n hopefully the one i wish to be with.. it's really time to say gd bye to dc.. i will miss my boss, wg n fl.. n aunty v.. pple from our gang.. we will keep in contacts.. the rest.. just bye bye..

sab is sick

supposed to reach acs by 8.30am for the excursion but i woke up at 8.35am when c called me.. there was no cab for a whole 15 mins! c called n asked me to rest @ hm instead since they r gg to lim chu kang.. so i went hm n rest.. anyway i am sick.. cough, sore throat, giddy n can feel the flu coming soon.. since cough medicine n woods (peppermint) do not work for me anymore.. mum asked me to take this chinese powder.. i took 2 bottles a few weeks ago when i had gastric problems.. going for rehearsal tonight, music exam is coming up, concert in 1 mth's time, then long holiday.. better recover soon.. time to rest.. hope by 7pm tonight i will feel better..

i am no super mario

resigning from dc in june, going for the long holiday in july.. n coming back in aug marks a new chapter in my life.. from aug my focus will b on ethan, kawai and school.. c told v n y tt i went out for a movie today n tution changed to 6pm.. v n y commented tt i was irresponsible.. wat is wrong with tt? i spend everyday with ethan n the rest of the time on lesson planning, preparing for materials n reading up.. c said she understands n bcos v n y r nt aware tt i go for tution EVERYDAY for 2 hrs.. ethan is not easy to teach... he is hyperactive.. but i am able to control him.. it is v tired to teach him but whenever he improves.. i am happy.. thats all i ask for.. seeing him grow n learn everyday.. ewan is waiting for me to teach him music.. evan is waiting for me to teach him music.. c is waiting for me to teach her 2 younger sons..

i haf no life.. everyday i am soo busy.. for eg. carene booked me a mth before for today's trip to jb.. but i am enjoying every minute of my life.. all i ask for is a simple life.. to do the things i enjoy.. money is nt everything.. happiness n health r the most impt to me.. happiness = being with the person i wish to be, able to do wat i really enjoy.. y am i soo busy.. so that each day will b occupied n so i will nt let my mind run wild.. n do silly things..

i am waiting.. waiting for myself to graduate.. 2 mre years.. i am waiting for myself.. i am waiting for u.. sometimes all i need is just a Hi.. a simple "How are you?" it will make the waiting shorter and faster.. or just tell me for the last time to leave this waiting game.. for the past 2 yrs i have shut all doors.. ignoring any door knocks..

bcos i believe wat i saw n felt.. 2 yrs haf past.. i am giving myself 3 mre yrs.. if the end do not turn out to be way i wish.. i will say gdbye to myself.. i am gg to bury myself in work.. c told me today to work with her friend, l.. to open music classes at l's school.. i told her i am interested..

i am no super mario...

dunkin donuts!

i simply love dunkin donuts..

went to jb jus to get them n watched shrek 3 with kenneth, carene n ben..






































munckins!!


















n so i bought 24 dunkins.. 23 flavours. ONE each with 2 TWO double chocolate n kenneth ate one of it...n 12 munckins.. about 44RM.. (about S$21)

4 boxes of dunkins.. (mine n kenneth's).. in all.. the 4 of us bought 78 dunkin donuts!!!!

went for tution after dunkins. gave the boys 5 dunkins..
ewan with half of the pink smilely face (strawberry jam)

all times fav

sore thoat.. cannt eat.. but i still buy it.

the most expensive chips ($6.90).. last one on the shelf..

left my contacts so that they will call me when there's more

another busy week

ok it's gonna b busy again.. (ry says since when i am free one.. oops!)

things to complete by this week:

1. ethan lesson plans / worksheets/ teaching materials
2. ROPOSAL!! mus send to sc by end of the wk..
3. reorganise my room..
4. pack my smurfs into the muji shelves i bought VERY long ago..
5. 2 rehearsals, 1 concert to attend

meanwhile i think i am gonna fall ill. sore thoart.. hai.. cannt leh.. no time to fall sick.. so many tings waiting for me to complete.. gonna take a break tml n go JB for movie marathon n dunkin donuts!!! since kenneth is driving.. i can buy the whole shop back!!! wahahahhaa

oops.. another shopping trip

pc show.. book fair.. i was on duty on sun, 3 June.. n i bought one 3-in-1 canon, webcam, mouse n lots of teaching materials for ethan.. spent a total of.. $200++i can now open a book shop at home.. with my new toy: scanner-copier-printer n my laminating machine, cutting board.. lots of paper.. lots of other stationary.. hee.. =)

time to say gd bye..

i realised i haf only 3 more shows @ dc before i say gd bye..so i walked into wg's room, sat down n told him the news.. he was playing with his laptop when i was talking to him..

his first sentence, "no time ar?"
i replied no, but no energy.
wg: what if don haf leh?
me: y don haf? they already approved, just waiting for my detail plans
wg: what if cannt leh?
me: y cannt? they will earn more if i start the new classes
wg: what if don haf leh?
me: (i din noe wat to say, but i knew that he was waiting for me to say i will return to dc if "don haf or cannt" so..) ... then i will come back..
wg: orh.. ok confirm then tell me
me: ok when confirm i will inform u.. but june may b my last month.. i am gg us for holiday in july, what you want?
wg: (he said something but i din catch it)
me: give me the name
wg: i will gif u the name n even the pictures n email u
me: ok.. don tell any1 yet abt wat i told u..
wg: ok i noe lar..
me: (i walked out his room..)

i can feel that he felt sad.. i felt sad too..
i told aunty violet.. she said gd for me to pursue my dreams, asked if wg is upset? she ended by saying that she only wish to see that my wish will come true..i told her that will have to wait for 3 yrs later.. i cant do anything now.. it's a different postal code problem..

i told mum abt it, she said mayb wg doesnt want me to leave, just return whenever i want to.. but i don wan to return to dc working, i will return as an audience..

i felt a total change this holiday.. spending all my time on ethan everyday, teaching him, watching him progress.. i tested him today on what was taught for the week, he got everything correct. he can now write a simple sentence by himself.. i almost cried.. his behaviour has changed as well.. i hope that i will help him not only in his work but in his behaviour.. soon i will help ewan n a few years later mayb evan.. it dosent matter if i spend all my time on ethan n preparing for his lessons.. i felt good to watch him grow n change from that playful little boy to now a little boy who can sit still n study for 2 hrs w/o any complain..

jia you ethan! jia you sab!

if everything goes well.. 23 june 2007 will b my last day @ dc.. gd bye dc..

goodbye..

the decision to leave dc may b earlier than expected.. june may b the last month i will appear in dc.. was telling roy today that i no longer feel happy going to dc.. he said i could jus ignore all those nonsense.. but i said there r certain things i cant explain.. i think it's time to move to the next level in my life.. i have spent 2 yrs @ dc.. there were many happy moments n many unhappy times.. gd bye.. i will return to dc as an audience..